With our honourable leader going to the Opera, the 3 Xl match against our old rivals ''The Flying Wickets'' was unlikely to pass without incident (and this was without the erstwhile Hardy nor our Chairman sledging the opposition from the boundary). The Wickets turned up with 9 (2 of their players thought the fixture was on Sunday 9 September). Scoring was going to be a challenge with the Wickets' scorer on holiday in Thailand for the third time this year.
At 2pm having lost the toss and been put in, I could only sight 5 players. As it turned out the younger members of the team all appeared to be crammed in to Aps' car for a smoke. They did not appear impressed when I put them down as 7-11 in the batting order. Things got interesting in the forth over when one of our year 13 debutantes gave H Baker out LBW to the Welsh Dragon (M Jones). After a couple more cheap wickets (I unsuccessfully asked their captain to remove Jones after one over - instead be bowled 11 followed by a further spell of 6). Our innings was saved by Ejaz Malik's excellent 50 ably supported by Aps (before retreating to his car) and Wynn Jones. Pras then preceded to play the shot of the day (according to Pras) before we were able to declare on 184/8.
Tea came and went with England v South Africa being a diversion for all but the Welsh Dragon & Aps (who seemed to prefer XFM). Rob Smith opened up the hill and Seb Aps roared down the hill to the experienced Wickets' openers. I then noticed that we were one short in the field - H Baker had ventured to Bromley only to later return - but where was the changing room key? Aps & Smith removed their top four (including a majestic innings from T Tamborajah which lasted 4 balls) but all looked lost as there was still no sign of the changing room key. Finally at 6pm our demon leg spinner A (Shane) Stoney remembered he had put in his car. During the time that HB was searching for the key the Welsh Dragon and the Ringer proceeded to put on 70 in 11 overs. They were approaching their 100 partnership when Wynn Jones produced a long hop which the Ringer thought he had smashed for 6 only to see Stoney take a fine catch on the deep square leg boundary.
Ignoring the advice from HB I kept Peter Wynn Jones on and with Wickets on 136, the alert Mike Marmion (making his debut behind the sticks) got a stumping. 2 balls later & the match was over. Have the OA's ever won a match by taking a hatrick? Answers by email to the Chairman or the MCC scorer. The over 35's retired to the bar whilst the under 20's sped off in Aps' car. The Welsh Dragon collapsed when he heard England had beaten the SA (I said he should have been taken off after one over).
And so on to Founders Day and the return of our leader and decorum.
John G
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